A letter to Mariah Carey

Dear Mariah,

I saw you on the Golden Globes last night. Your gown looked like party streamers trying to support two water balloons. There was no easy way to soften the blow. Sorry.

You are a smart, talented, beautiful woman. But honey, you're now longer a single digit size.
You're a little chunky-dunky and you need to face up to that. You can longer wear the same sizes or fashions you did when you are eighteen. Where is your self-respect? Your mirror?

You don't have to bare flesh to be sexy. Look at Pamela Anderson. She actually covered up her gigantic ta-ta's. Sure, it looked like she used a baby sling to hold those suckers up, but it she received raves on her outfit.

Believe me, you are by no means fat. I wish my "chunky-dunky" looked as good as yours. You have lovely curves that would be served better with a slinky, well cut dress that keeps your less than firm areas covered while accentuating your positive points.

So, come on, Mariah. Hire a new stylist. One with class. And took a good honest look at yourself in the mirror. Nothing is more embarrassing than a thick girl who still thinks she's thin.


****************************************************************

THE SUPREME WISDOM OF THE QUEENOSHEBA

What goes around, comes around. Just hope you're still around to see it.